Funny Jokes

Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?
Father: Tumhe kaisi biwi chahiye?
Son: Mujhe chand jai si biwi chahiye, Jo raat ko aaye aur subha chali jaye!

Patient : I always see spots before my eyes.
Patient : I always see spots before my eyes.
Doctor : Didn't the new glasses help?
Patient : Sure, Now i see the spots much clearer.!!

Early to bed and early to rise
Early to bed and early to rise makes ur girlfriend go out with other guys.
 

Husband asks, Do u know the meaning of WIFE.
Husband asks, Do u know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Evrytime!
WIFE on hearing this says,
it could also mean-With Idiot For Ever.
 

Doctor to Patient : The check which u gave
Doctor to Patient : The check which u gave me has returned back.
Patient to Doctor:The head-ache for which you gave me medicine has also returned back.

Why did sardar cut the sides of medicine:

Why did sardar cut the sides of medicine before eating it ? think think think to avoid sde EFFECTS.

How Old is ur father
Tcher: How Old is ur father. Sunny: As old as I m. Tcher: How is it possible? Sunny: He bcom father only after I was born.

Ek sawal...14 FEB VALENTINES
Ek sawal...14FEB VALENTINES DAY ko log AISA KYA KARTE HAI KI THEEK 9 MAHINAY BAAD 14 NOV KO "CHILDREN DAY" MANANA PADTA HAI.

Mammu

Vo aaj bhi hume dekh kar muskurate hain

Yeh to unke bache hee kamine hain,

Jo Mammu-Mammu bulaate hain.

Papa
1st Child: Mere Papa Bahut Darpok Hain.
2nd Child: Why?
1st Child: Jab Bhi Road Cross Karte Hain, Meri Ungli Pakad Lete Hain aur kehte chhodna mat.

Mard ki life

Har mard ki life dekho to

Without shadi SPIDERMAN

Shadi k time SUPERMAN

Shadi k bad GENTLEMAN

or Biwi khubsurat ho to puri umar WATCHMAN

2 Sardars looking at Egyptian mummy
2 Sardars looking at Egyptian mummy.Sardar1:Look so many bandages, pakka truck accident case. Sardar2: Aaho, truck nambar bhi likha hai. BC-1760!!

Teacher asked a boy
Once a math's teacher asked a boy:
If U have 12 chocolates,
U give 4 to Huma,
5 to Sobia and 3 to Maliha
What wil U have?
He replied: 3 new girlfriends.
 

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day?
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day?.?.?.?.... It is just a formality, like two boxers shaking hands b4 the fight begins !

Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Every time!
WIFE says No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever

Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Sardar was writing something very slowly. Friend asked: Why r u writing so slowly? Sardar: Im writing 2 my 6 yr old son, he cant read very fast.

 
Sardar proposed a Girl...... Girl said Im 1yr elder to you
Sardar proposed a Girl...... Girl said Im 1yr elder to you........... Sardar said Oye No Problem Soniye, Ill marry you NEXT YEAR.

Sardar to Girlfriend
Sardar to Girlfriend= Darling main tum se shaadi nahi karsakta gharwale mana karrahe hai. Girlfriend= Tumhare ghar me kaun kaun hai. Sardar= 1 biwi aur 3 bacche...

A sardar-Doctor falls in Love
A sardar-Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse. He writes a love letter to the Nurse :- I Love U sister....
 

Two Lovers Plan to die
2 Lovers plan to suicide. Boy jumped first, Girl closed her eyes & return back saying love is blind. Boy in air opened his parachute saying love never dies.